Dr. Scott Turansky: How Can Firmness & Consistency Help Parents Discipline More Effectively?

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“It’s never too late. God changes people at any age; he changes little children, he changes, elementary-aged children, he changes teenagers, he even changes adults; so, we’re really grateful that God’s grace permeates the heart of any person.” -Scott Turansky.

Dr. Scott Turansky is the co-founder of the National Center for Biblical Parenting and the author of over 15 books. He is a professor at Concordia University, where he teaches the master’s level parenting class to students who will be social workers, counselors, and ministry professionals. During this second part of the two-part episode series, Scott continues to share his wisdom and expertise regarding effective disciplining to help parents reach children’s hearts, specifically emphasizing the effectiveness of taking a break versus a time out and the benefits of parenting with firmness and consistency.

Scott elaborates on the difference between a break and a time-out and how a break is much more effective than a time-out. Taking a “time out” is not a good parenting model because it’s a punitive punishment like a timed sentence that a child has to serve for a “crime” they’ve committed. Taking a “break” is more effective because it is based on repentance in the Bible, and it transfers responsibility to the child by letting them come back on their own terms when they feel like they’ve had a change of heart.

“There comes this point when time and conscience and the Holy Spirit work in a child’s heart, and they come back and say, ‘Okay, I’m ready.’ That’s what we’re looking for – that’s the power of the break.” -Scott Turansky,

Scott shares tools parents can implement to help improve communication and effectively reach their obstinate teenagers when disciplining. First, there has to be a relationship between the child and the parent. Although parents should have empathy and sympathy for their child, they must also have firmness and consistency when disciplining to be most effective for long-term results. He shares real-life examples of children who have had a heart transformation through a balance of consistency and firmness.

“We need to trust the Lord and recognize that God can use these times in our child’s life for us to make an impact, and we don’t have to do it with a hammer.” -Scott Turansky.

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