[ad_1]
Have you been letting fear keep you from making changes? Many of us have the best intentions yet we get stuck in the cycle of taking in information and not acting on it. Join me in part 4 of our mental refresh series as I discuss why making a change goes beyond having willpower, the top 3 things that prevent us from making changes, and how we can overcome the fear of change. Become your best you this summer by being obedient to God and making the changes that He has been calling you to do!
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN:
[02:41] God Cannot Change Us Until We Are Willing + Able to Change
[09:35] Will You Decide to Follow What God is Calling You to Do?
[12:29] We Cannot Solely Focus on Willpower to Change
[16:24] Are You Afraid of How Making a Change is Going to Affect Others?
[23:28] Are You Letting Your Emotions Impact The Changes You Want to Make?
[26:06] “Faith + Trust in God is The Bridge That Carries Us Over The Fear of Change”
[28:58] Three Resources to Help You Build Structure Around Life Changes
[02:41] God Cannot Change Us Until We Are Willing to Change
In part four of this summer refresh series, I want you to ask yourself “What am I going to do about this information and concepts that were revealed to me?” We can take in information all of the time but if we are not going to obey and respond with what God wants us to do, then there is no point in learning. God challenged me with some insights recently when He revealed to me why I was behaving a certain way. He asked me if I was going to do something to make healing happen or to instead choose to keep looking at it.
Many of us see things that we want to change all of the time but truthfully, no one besides you and God knows what is going on in your head. Since we cannot see anything on the outside, it ends up being a subtle thing that the enemy can keep us trapped in. We may intend to follow God and do the right thing but we get distracted and start talking ourselves out of it. We end up sitting in fear, thinking that we do not have the skills, and we end up sliding back down to where we were. We can have the best intentions but we need to do something about it. And I want to remind you that this is not to shame you, this is to open the door for change and possibilities.
God cannot change us unless we choose to step into the change. As the word says, “Discipline is never easy in the moment but it produces a harvest of right living.” So if we could get beyond the pain of making a change then we can see what is on the other side of it.
I also want to remind you that change is not always about you, the change you make can also impact others. I have been learning this lately because as I am obedient to God, I see the impact on others. People are waiting for you to make a change, address these issues, or lean into what He has been revealing to you.
The refresh we need is not going to be gift-wrapped to us. We often have this false notion that if we just sit down, someone is going to come take care of everything. This is very rarely the case. There has to be a decision on our part to be different and we get to decide what we are going to do with the knowledge that we are given.
Ephesians 5:5-12 talks about imitating God, refusing to let sexual immorality, impurity, or greed be those things that drive us. We are not called to participate in those things but if you continue in the passage to Ephesians 5:15, it says, “Be careful how you live, don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise, make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.” We can read about how God wants us to live but we need to decide to make a change. Sometimes I wish that God could make me be or do something but when I realized that the ultimate act of love was God’s unwillingness to force us to do anything – it made me take responsibility with His support.
[09:35] Will You Decide to Follow What God is Calling You to Do?
Our church is currently going through the book of Revelation and the first few chapters are letters that are written from Jesus to some of the churches who were present at the time. In all these letters, there is this really interesting model that Jesus uses in how he guides, corrects, and moves them toward change. He first gives them a vision of who He is in his revived body and how He is the King of kings and the Lord of lords. He tells them something that He is proud of them for, something that they need to change, encourages them to make that change, and also shares what will happen if they do not make that change.
There is this process of God giving this loving correction because He wants them to have the fullness that he has designed for them. Ultimately, each person in these churches has to decide what they are going to do with that information. God cannot make any of us change. He points things out to us and waits for us to respond. So what will you decide to do today with what God is calling you to do?
[12:29] We Cannot Solely Focus on Willpower to Change
When God brings a change that we may need to make to our attention, we do not want to just focus on willpower. Willpower is a cognitive decision that may get us up and going but willpower is not enough for us to make a lasting change. There is scientific evidence about how quickly willpower can burn out which is why a lot of people register for the gym in January and then by February, they stop going.
We have to find something to replace that willpower when it runs out. Understanding the motivation behind making the changes we want to make is key. No one can answer this for you and in the first week of the Christian Mindset Makeover, we do a practice called “My why for making change.” There is going to be a lot of opposition to making these changes. You are going to have to keep persevering through when you are tired, uncomfortable, and afraid. We talk about these questions within this first week:
-Why are you doing this?
-What happens if you do nothing and ignore all of this material?
-How could your life be different if you decide to make changes in different areas of life?
This allows us to have this vision of a future version of ourselves. This is more than a cognitive decision, it is a decision where you envision yourself showing up differently in your marriage, being a calmer mother, or feeling free in Christ. These visions are what are going to carry us when we get tired and do not want to move forward when our willpower runs out. Having people who consistently ask us to reflect on why we are doing something is also important in making these lasting changes.
[16:24] Are You Afraid of How Making a Change is Going to Affect Others?
Many of us do not want to make a change because we feel the influence of how others are going to be affected by the decisions we make. We do not want someone to get upset with us and our new practices or boundaries. God has been revealing to me some deep-seated people-pleasing patterns that formed in childhood. He has recently given me a few different instances where I could respond differently to this pattern. I have been trying to monitor my peace and control in my life by making sure that everyone likes me and is okay with what I am doing. This is part of what is making me feel burnt out and exhausted. I am thankful that God revealed this to me because I do not want to allow other people’s opinions to decide if I am worthy or not – that is letting man’s opinion be above God’s.
I have felt such freedom in how I handled those situations. I am not perfect. Yet moving in the direction that God wants me to move in has given me so much confidence. We often feel like if we do hard things it is going to be so painful. The truth is that yes, it might hurt, but we aren’t going to die. Some of us in the first world nations need to understand that we can persevere through a little bit of pain and discomfort – and it is okay in the name of doing what is right. That is just an example of how this has been working out for me.
Psalm 38:11-14 says, “My loved ones and friends stay away fearing my disease. Even my own family stands at a distance. Meanwhile, my enemies lay traps to kill me. Those who wish me harm, make plans to ruin me. All day long. They plan their treachery, but I am deaf to all their threats. I am silent before them as one who cannot speak. I choose to hear nothing and I make no reply.” It takes courage and boldness to say, “People are going to be mad, I might lose my job, but I am not going to compromise what God is calling me to do.” We need to have boldness in this culture. I am not talking about standing on a corner yelling at people, I am talking about not letting God be pushed out of what is around us. We have given so much power to fear and we need to be bold and stand against that.
If you struggle with fear you are not alone, please make sure to check out these past episodes. I understand fear can be crippling but we do not have to let it keep us from making the decisions that we know we need to make.
243: What to Do When Fear Strikes (3 Steps to Living in Peace + Hope)
244: You Can Have a Different Response to Fear and Anxiety
252: Discovering God-Centered Courage to Confidently Move Through Fear with Jennifer Allwood
[23:28] Are You Letting Your Emotions Impact The Changes You Want to Make?
Many of us are also waiting for emotions to come before our obedience to change. Have you ever found yourself saying, “I really do not feel like doing this right now” or as we often say in Christian circles, “Feel a peace” about doing this. Some of us are waiting for our emotions to line up with our changes. I just finished writing my book, “Emotional Confidence: 3 Simple Steps to Manage Emotions with Science and Scripture” and I had to learn very quickly that it is not about only writing when you are “in the mood” to write. You have a deadline and responsibilities. Some of us are waiting for that inspiration but what if we just decided to move forward and fail?
My entire book is about emotions so I know that they are an important way to help us understand what God is trying to highlight inside of us. However, emotions are not a guide for telling us how to respond to what God tells us to do. We cannot wait for them to show up and guide us. If we are just waiting for the emotions to come, what happens when the inspiration stops right in the middle of the process? We cannot let our emotions roll over what we want to do. We decide to make changes with the knowledge that God has given us, based on truth, not on up and down emotions.
[26:06] “Faith + Trust in God is The Bridge That Carries Us Over The Fear of Change”
The third thing that keeps us from change is that we are afraid of it. We are afraid of anything other than the “status quo”. I know that change is not easy, it always involves risk. Our brains are adverse to change because they understand what is currently happening, whether it is dysfunctional or not. Our brains do not like not knowing what the outcome could be. We need to be really honest that our brains do not like change and that there is always a risk. There is always that gap between obedience and action.
Faith and trust in God is the bridge that carries us over that fear of change. We have a God who loves us, knows what is next, and who is in charge of the universe. We can trust Him to help us through change. We do not have to let our fears and our feelings dictate what we do. I want you to think about this question today, “Are you going to take action on those little things percolating in your heart for your good and His glory?”
[28:58] Three Resources to Help You Build Structure Around Life Changes
I want to give you three resources that you can use to help you make these changes. The first one is the Goal Setting Workshop. In this workshop, I walk you through the exact process I use every six months. We figure out what happened in the past few months, what is happening now that we can celebrate while also honoring the hard, and then dreaming of what could be. This gives us a guide to what could come next for us. If you know that you need to make a change but do not know how to move toward it, this is a great way to create a plan.
If you know what direction you need to take but need to practice making space in your life to hear from God, the Christian Mindset Refresh Bundle is a great tool. There are three different resources within this: Biblical affirmations, Christian Meditations for Daily Calm, and a Bible study on God’s love. The affirmations remind us of who we are in Christ, there are 30 different meditations under 7 minutes long, and the Bible study will help you get to the heart of what has kept you from believing in God’s love.
Lastly, if you have been feeling like you need to address deeper mindset patterns like people pleasing, perfectionism, and performing to feel worthy – check out the Christian Mindset Makeover. If you want to be done with those patterns and finally address the subconscious soundtracks that are running the show, I would encourage you to join.
Whether you access these resources or not, I pray you take action and be obedient to God. He wants you to find healing and rest in your mind but He can only do so much. In order to change things in our hearts, we have to decide if we are going to let Him in. I want you to just think about how could life be different if you made these changes. What if you started to take this idea of making space to hear from God through things like mindfulness seriously?
There is a law in science that says, if you do not do anything to a certain situation, it is going to continually move towards entropy. Things will not get better if we do not take action, they may actually get worse. The way to live better is to listen to what God says and to trust Him in this. Get tools and resources if you need them, but if nothing else, listen to His voice, and let Him guide you toward the best thing that is in front of you!
RESOURCES:
Ready for a step-by-step plan based on the Bible + brain science to identify + rewire subconscious thoughts so they line up with your true identity in Christ? Join us in the Christian Mindset Makeover!
Are you constantly stressed, like life’s demands steal your peace + purpose? If so, check out the Christian Mindset Refresh Bundle — your brain-science and Bible-based mindset toolkit designed to guide you back to Christ-centered peace, godly self-worth, and the heart of God’s unfailing love.
Want to gain a fresh perspective on your life? Step out of the chaos + join me for a fresh touch from God with the Goal Setting Workshop.
Tired of up-and-down feelings stealing your peace, sabotaging your relationships, and filling your mind with self-defeating thoughts? If so, make sure to join the launch team for my new book, “Emotional Confidence: 3 Simple Steps to Manage Emotions with Science and Scripture”, coming November 12th!
RELATED EPISODES:
243: What to Do When Fear Strikes (3 Steps to Living in Peace + Hope)
244: You Can Have a Different Response to Fear and Anxiety
252: Discovering God-Centered Courage to Confidently Move Through Fear with Jennifer Allwood
258: When You’re a Human “Doing” Instead of a Human Being
[ad_2]
Source link
You must be logged in to post a comment.