About the Children’s Department: So, DO Something!

Even as we watched this happen, we did not connect this exodus to our failure (and yes, it is our failure) to teach the “whys”. Yes, we absolutely must teach what we believe, but we also must teach the “whys”, so we equip the children we love with a confident faith which is able to withstand the questions they will face as they grow up.

We also did not know we needed to equip parents and grandparents so they are able to teach the “whys”. We equip them to teach the “whats”, but not the “whys”. Then, when the grown children and grandchildren they love turn away from their faith, these parents and grandparents are left to suffer – they feel like complete failures. They thought they did what they needed to do – they taught the “whats” – but then the ones they love left their faith. These parents and grandparents do not know what happened and they feel alone.

Why do they feel alone? Partly because they see families at church where the young people did not leave their faith and while they are happy for them, it makes them feel even more like failures and they feel embarrassed, so they suffer alone. Also partly because the church doesn’t truly care enough to offer more than platitudes – “I’m so sorry the ones you love have left their faith. We will pray with you for them.” While they appreciate the prayers – you may be certain these parents and grandparents have said many prayers – and may feel like their prayers are just “bouncing off the ceiling.”

When the church says, “We have ministry to grandparents.” They almost always mean their Senior Saint’s Ministry. Most grandparents become grandparents in their late 40’s and early 50’s – they are not yet retired, so they do not participate in a Senior Saint’s Ministry as they work when the Senior Saints meet for their Bible studies, meals, pickle ball, etc.

These parents and grandparents need ministry which equips them to hand down confident faith – one which helps them know how to teach the “whys”. They need to have people who genuinely care and come alongside them in their grief and feelings of failure. They need far, far more than a Senior Saint’s Ministry.

So, once again as I wrote at the start of this post, “Over the years I’ve served in Children’s Ministry I’ve come to understand something VERY important. We do not know what we do not know until something happens which gets our attention.” I hope this post gets your attention. I hope it motivates you to do something to minister to parents and grandparents by equipping them to hand down confident faith and to genuinely encourage them so they do not feel alone – because if you do not, they most certainly will feel alone.