How to Handle an Out of Control Child

Your child is raging and you don’t know what you do. Here are things you can do in and out of the moment if your child is out of control

If your child has explosive behavior, you may find yourself walking around the house on tip-toes, afraid of what might set him off next. This can create a viscous cycle. Break out of the cycle with information and insights on how to handle an out of control child.

Identify and address your own feelings

One element of this process is to examine your feelings about these episodes. What feelings bubble up in you when your child rages with anger? Do you feel intense rage yourself? Do you feel panic? Shame? Fear? This might take some time for you to figure out and it is likely linked to past experiences. Parents who grew up in an explosive environment can have those memories activated by rage in their child.

How you feel about your child’s rage and anger matters. It will impact how you respond and the underlying dynamics. If you need help getting to the root of this issue, parent counseling might be helpful for you.

Observe and record

The first step is to know the full picture of what you are dealing with. It may feel like your child’s rage and explosions come out of no where, but there are likely signs or situations that trigger it.

It is important to do this step first even though it doesn’t immediately address the problem. Below is a printable you can use to examine the behavior, possible triggers and how the incident resolved. This information will be important for the next step.

This article is for informational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment from a qualified mental health professional. Cornerstones for Parents is not liable for any advice, tips, techniques, and recommendations the reader chooses to implement.

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